Sample From The Introduction

What Makes Recruiting Love Different?
This book will not teach you how to flirt. It will not encourage you to play "hard to get," or any other games that should be left behind after high school. Unlike other dating guides, we didn't fill the book with endless psychological tests or pop-psychology lectures on why you should pick one person over another. Instead, through a unique business analogy, we show you how to stay focused, organized, and most of all, ACTIVE. We will change your way of thinking about your love search, and help you accomplish this challenging task with dignity, efficiency, and pleasure. As you complete the "Action Memo" at the end of each chapter, you will be creating a personalized plan for finding love. As a love recruiter, you call the shots and you control your search. You will actively seek out and find love, not wait passively for love to find you. You will map out the most efficient route, planning step-by-step to "recruit" and "select" the love you really want.

What Do I Have to Do to Make It Work?
Like anything worth having, recruiting love takes hard work. We strongly believe it has to be your #1 priority (after staying alive and being responsible to your family and job) for as long as the search takes you. The plan won't work if you just read the first chapter, complete a couple of action memos, and then stay home and wait for something to happen. Recruiting Love works like any business plan - there are chronological steps you must research, plan, and follow. You set target dates, and stick to them as best as possible. You should plan and schedule your recruiting activities every week. Write them on your calendar (just like a business meeting) and (just like a business project) commit yourself to doing them. You can't just "try" at this - you have to DO it! The harder you work, the easier it gets, and the quicker you'll see results.

How Does Recruiting Love Work?
This book helps you select the kind of partner you want, determine where the best candidates are, and efficiently target your search using the business skills that you already have. Suppose you wanted to find whole wheat bread at the supermarket. It wouldn't be very efficient to walk up and down every aisle wishing and hoping to find the perfect loaf. You would find the bread aisle, select a few brands from the endless varieties on display, and (after considering price, size, etc.) select the loaf that's right for you. That's also the idea of our book - we don't tell you what kind of person would be best for you, but we do show you how you can maximize your chances of finding that person, without walking up and down infinite aisles of toads!

But Won't This Take Time and Effort?
If you've stuck with us this far, you're probably a successful professional (or well on your way!) and have undoubtedly put in some long hours at the office. Why wouldn't you work just as hard to reach your personal goals? Each love search is unique, so we can't tell you exactly how long it will take. We can say that the time and effort you put into recruiting love is a lifetime investment. If it takes you a while, it's not much when you consider that reaching this goal will continue to reap rewards for as long as you live! (Can you really say that about all your overtime at the office?) If you've looked for a job before, you'll find that recruiting love requires activities similar to those you've already used in business. The difference is that in this search, you're the recruiter and the employer, and your potential dates are your job "candidates!"

Why The Business Analogy? I'm Looking for Love, Not an Employee!
With Recruiting Love, you make the decisions, and you choose the candidate. As a love recruiter, you can make love happen through identifying what you want, knowing what you have to offer, planning and targeting your search, and using the appropriate tools (which we provide throughout the book). It's a challenging process, but not an overwhelming or humiliating one, because you have active control over the entire campaign!

This Sounds so Calculating! I Thought Love was About Feelings!
Don't misunderstand us. We're not saying the love search is exactly like the business deal. We know that no matter how carefully you plan, there still needs to be that "spark" that (hopefully!) you won't find in any job search! But a spark should be just that - a spark - and not a blinding light! The divorce rate is staggering 50 percent. Many of these divorces break up families and severely impact children. It may not seem very romantic, but the statistics prove that we DO need to put more thought into the love search. There are plenty of more romantic dating guides out there, but what good is a ring or a "yes" if you're headed for divorce court later?

But How Do I Know What I Really Want?
The Recruiting Love plan assumes that as an adult, you can decide what you want. To help you clarify your vision and make it complete, we will give you some thought-provoking exercises, but we won't talk down to you or use pop-psychology to create easy answers. If you are looking for that, there are already plenty of books. (However, those books won't help you target, locate, and recruit someone special.) Take inspiration from the "Bottom Line" aphorisms, and true stories throughout the book. These stories are from people just like you - people who have invested too much time in their high school dating techniques, and who have kissed their share (or more) of toads! For professional recruiters, there is no more satisfying reward than finding the perfect match for a position. For you, as a love-recruiter, there's nothing more satisfying than being with the partner you've planned for, dreamed about, and worked so hard to find. Good luck and happy hunting!

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