I have a saying: If you bring a woman a French maid’s outfit as a gift, there had better be two tickets to France (first class or at least business class) in that box as well, or you can kiss that relationship, goodbye! Yet, you can’t imagine how many men still feel compelled to purchase gifts of cringe-worthy lingerie that couldn’t possibly fit , or are obviously tacky and cheap, picked up at the local “love” store. The woman who gets a gift like that knows the gift isn’t really for her. in truth, Iif there’s one situation that seems to bring the most anguish, the most questions, and then the most hits on those questions on my relationship site, Leather and Lace Advice, it is always issues of gift giving, disappointment, and utter despair when expectations are not met.
Giving a gift to a lover is challenging. You may know them intimately, but depending upon your level of communication and how long you’ve been a couple (not to mention your budget), you might not really know what they are thinking. The holidays, Valentines Day, birthdays and anniversaries are particularly difficult for couples, because we are raised with different ideas about what gift-giving is all about. Some families exchange opulent gifts, some families give socks. Some people don’t celebrate or exchange gifts at all. The wrong gift (or no gift) has caused plenty of breakups, even divorces. Read: I Got Him A Gift But He Didn’t Get Me One — Now What?
If you want to spice up the holidays with an intimate and spicy gift (once you are intimate, sending these suggestions to a friend or new boyfriend or girlfriend is not recommended) but you don’t want to send the wrong message or leave him or her in tears, I have selected some “spicy” but elegant and unique gifts (from dozens and dozens) that I think are targeted to specific interests when a couple has been together for a while. If you are already comfortable with one another as lovers, some of these may be just what you are looking for to make the holidays “spicy.” If you are too shy to ask for something, just send the link to your partner, or print out the page and leave it somewhere visible with the gift you want, checked. S/he’ll get the message.
LINGERIE SHE’LL LOVE YOU FOR:
If you are going to gift your special lady with lingerie, make it something she would be proud to wear (in public or at least under her clothes). I love this luxe bed jacket from the Obsession Collection of Nevaeh Intimates (Price: $202.00 Style #: 05101). The feather patterned raschel eyelash lace bed jacket with fluttered sleeves and a contrasting, silky sash for the waist (in purple, black or berry) make a beautiful statement worn over bare skin, bra and panties, or over a cami as a jacket for a party. It is Made with 94%/6% Silk/Lycra (Hand wash with mild soap and hang dry).
When I attended a boudoir photo shoot at Lori Berkowitz ‘s photo studio, just about every single editor opted to wear this item for her photo shot, myself included. My photo is at the top of the page. This makes a great gift because it is intimate but also versatile, and isn’t just something to wear in the bedroom. Wear this over a cami or shell, and it goes to a party, too. This bed jacket is available in sizes XS to XL and runs true to size. You can probably check what size bed jacket to get her based on what her normal sweater or jacket size is. But Nevaeh Intimates also has amazingly beautiful (and comfortable bras, panties and slips, and garter belts). If you want to buy those for your special someone, I’d suggest you get a gift certificate and let her choose what she likes in the right size. Visit the Neveah Intimates web site: http://www.nevaehintimates
GIFTS TO GIVE TO EACH OTHER:
Spicy Subscriptions is a unique take on a “of the month club. Each month you get a themed box of products that can help you rev up your love life. The box will be a surprise, but it will include some full sized items, and some samples sized items, and might include such items as massage candles, intimate toys, oils, and other romantic items. The sample box that Leather and Lace SPICE received is the one in the photo, above. You choose a Subscription type: The Spice Box ($29/Month) or Toy of the Month ($19.95/Month). Each month is specially themed differently by the company’s relationship experts, so you can look forward to a unique experience each month.
The Spice Box changes every month and has 4- 5 items to enhance your pleasure or your mood. The box The Advice Sisters received included a very nice lipstick/wand vibrator although bigger than a normal lipstick vibrator, when opened, it looked like a mascara wand but with a difference: that the wand vibrated at various select able speeds (controlled by push button on the base of the unit). Other items in this box included scarf ties for a gentle bondage experience, a pair of handcuffs (with safe release) for those doing role play, a small candle in a tin to set the mood, and a little fingertip vibrator good for travel. There were also some sample sized lubricants and massage/warming oils. All in all this seems to be a good value despite the randomness of what you may receive. For couples who don’t communicate well about their fantasies and needs, or for couples looking for some inspiration, getting a surprise box like this one from Spicy Subscriptions each month, can help generate discussion, improve intimacy and get couples trying things they might not ordinarily think of on their own. It’s also a way for those who might not consider visiting a “love” store to try new things. You and your lover may find you’re really looking forward to getting those boxes every month but you can always cancel if you wish. Visit https://spicysubscriptions.com/
By now you’ve probably read 50 Shades of Gray movie and are waiting for the movie to hit the big screen on Valentines’ Day 2015. If the idea of playing “Christian and Ana” entices you, try the DARE ME PLEASURE SET ($118.00) The Gift Set for Exploring Shared Fantasies by LELO. This elegant set will help you try out BDSM-lite in an acceptable and easy way, starting with a beautifully boxed trio of treats: a soft-tasseled Sensua Suede Whip and Etherea Silk Cuffs, and for those who want to add additional pleasure, you can add a set of their stellar Luna Beads™ Noir. Luna Beads (call them Kegel Beads if you want and Read the LeatherandLaceSPICE.com Review of LELO’s Luna Beads) create subtle yet pleasurable vibrations that respond to movement, The box also includes a Gift Card and Satin Storage Pouch. If your partner hasn’t read the books, get the audio book version and listen, together on those chilly, winter nights, while snuggling.This is a great gift for couples who want to try very light BDSM without feeling sleazy or silly trying it or suggesting it to their partner.. LELO has delivered a most elegant play set for people who want to try fantasy play. The flogger , for example, is small and not really designed to provide punishment, but rather to stimulate and titillate the skin for pleasure. The cuffs and silk ribbons are to stimulate your imagination, perhaps lightly binding the hands –use your imagination and read the book together or listen to the audio version. Visit the LELO Web Site: http://www.lelo.com/
LIGHT HIS FIRE AND PAMPER HIM !
A MASSAGER FOR HIM OR HER OR TO GIVE TO A COUPLE:
This is a big ticket gift that I think would be great to give a couple, or for a couple to invest in for each other, but frankly, it’s for anyone be they single or in a relationship, or even to give a family member who would love to reduce physical stress. It’s the Lelo Smart Wand Large $189.00 which you can purchase in ivory, plum, or black. This Ultra-powerful Cordless Body Massager lookd like a work of art, and it is elegantly boxed for gift giving and for starge, but it is a powerful cordless wand massager that is ideal of use all over your body. A SenseTouch™ Builds Vibrations on Contact with Skin and there are 8 Vibration Patterns with Adjustable Speeds to choose from. The body-safe silicone design is 100% waterproof and rechargeable (8 hours of use) and it comes with a 1 year warranty and a 10-year quality guarantee.
Ball headed wand massagers have been a staple of both relieving neck and back pain, as well as pleasure, for decades. But this one is cordless, making it much easier to use. For neck and back pain, Lelo has made the handle curved, as opposed to straight, allowing the user to reach the affected portion of their body without strain or contortions. Lelo has made it convenient by making it rechargeable with a fast charging rate and a 2 hour continuous use on one charge. The three covered buttons allow the user to adjust the rate of vibration and the intensity of the vibration as well as providing a number of different patterns of vibration (switching the vibration on/off at different rates and ramping up and down in speed). The most important feature is the seamless plastic surface over the entire massager making it waterproof and allowing the user to clean it thoroughly.
This personal pleasure object is not just good looking but multi-tasking, and therefore makes a great holiday gift idea for a family, or a couple, and for singles people. I appreciate that it is quiet, and ergonomic, making it easy to hold for longer periods of time. And, of course, it is nice to look at — a beautiful piece of “art.” This massager can make an ache go away, and a tense day into a spa-ah day, and frankly, it’s not just another “intimate item” but it can certainly do fabulous things to spice up your love life too. While there are other large multi-tasking massagers, few of them are cordless and this powerful. The price point for what you get is well worth it. Visit the LELO Web Site: http://www.lelo.com/
FOR LOVERS WHO MAY NOT BE TOGETHER ALL THE TIME BUT WANT TO STAY CONNECTED:
FOR THE TRAVELER:
The LoveLife Collection from OhMiBod
OhOhMiBod LoveLife Collection is a more traditional type of vibe, but it has a romantic story attached to it. The Creators of OhMiBod Suki and Brian Dunham were inspired to create the LoveLife Collection as a celebration of their own 26 year relationship and the intimate pleasure objects they wanted to see created for themselves. They also wanted to make this particular line affordable and beautifully designed. These vibrators have already received accolades including a Red Dot Design Award (an internationally recognized design competition) for 2014. Leather and Lace SPICE is including a photo of the entire LoveLife Line, and in the coming months (before Valentines Day, we promise) we will be reviewing additional pieces of the LoveLife Line in including the innovative “Adventure “with three points of body contacts, and the curved G-spot “Cuddle”
Traveliers will love the LoveLife “Discover” Mini Intimate Massager ($59.00) boxed in a white box with red hearts. Of course it can be part of her/their intimate life at home, with a partner or for the single person as well. W
This mini-sized massager has simple controls, one button at the bottom turns the unit on and off and cycles through the 7 scalable pre-set vibration patterns. (Size: 4.9” total length, 1.2” diameter at the widest point, – Weight: 2.2 oz Materials: Body safe silicone & PU coated ABS, Phthalate free) runs on a USB-charged Lithium-Ion battery which has after a charging time of about 2 1/2 hours, a run time of about 2 hours and a standby time of up to 90 days.
This mini sized massager is peppy enough to have a good time with and it is also reasonably quiet. The USB charging cable and a white satin travel pouch are included, If there is just one thing missing, it is a lock . You depress the power button for a few seconds to turn the vibrator on which should avoid any accidents, but in the unlikely case it accidentally presses against something and activate in your suitcase or purse, a lock mode would be a welcome, added safety. For more information on this and all the OhMiBod products visit the OhMiBod web Site http://www.ohmibod.com/